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There has of late been some debate about what exactly happened at Midsummer Coronation regarding naval actions on the part of three regions of the Kingdom. As an independent witness to the proceedings this reporter can lay the facts out as they happened on the day. It all started when Cernac, sometimes called the Navigator, got it into his head to commandeer a vessel and invade Monkey Island, which sits in the placid waters of Lake Marsjö. He also managed to persuade Master Duarte Goncalves to join him in this venture and in the opinion of this reporter the Kingdom is lucky he did, for on his own Cernac surely would have found a rock and sunk his vessel.

The two Insulae Draconis invaders, calling themselves “The First Wave”, proceeded to don life-preservers (again, fortunate) and take up positions in the canoe. Customarily both parties in a canoe sit facing the front. In the case of Cernac and Duarte, they opted to both face the centre of the canoe. When questioned, the former stated “There didn’t seem to be room for my legs the other way. Besides, we had to keep an eye out for pirates” which speaks volumes, as they were watching each other. The Admiral of the Insulae Draconis navy, also present at the beach, here showed the first signs of doubtful qualifications by allowing these two out as the first wave of invaders.

From the shore, this reporter then observed the I.D. vessel zig-zag across the water in the general direction of Monkey Island. “Evasive action,” Master Cernac called this peculiar route, upon return to shore. Nothing at all to do with lack of skills one is to believe. Spying the invasion, one loyal Knight from Nordmark sprung into action to try to forestall an occupation, and a second canoe was launched, with Sir William of Richwood in the stern, his lady Isabetta del Verde in the prow and the newest Countess of the Realm, Siobhan Inghean Ui Liathain, as an ambassador. This crew quickly paddled the Nordmark navy in a straight line for Monkey Isle, but despite heroic efforts the Insulae Draconis navy, with an insurmountable lead, had already gone ashore and claimed to be standing on “Insulae Draconis East.”

From on-shore we could hear Master Cernac the Inspired calling for the second wave of the Insulae Draconis navy. At which point the Admiral, Alwyn de Renham was unmasked completely. “I’m afraid of the water! And I can’t paddle,” he was heard to say. Instead of taking decisive action, said Admiral then tried to purchase a second crew, in which task he failed.

During this time, when this reporter was following the action on shore, the Nordmark navy had liberated the canoe on which the invaders had travelled, and absented themselves and the vessel from Monkey Island. At this point the Baron of Aarnimetsä decided that something ought to be done, and he launched a skiff, loaded it with an attack-dog and its handler Lady Jolanda de Meyre, his loyal subject Sir Oliver of Harjuwalcea. They, also being sea-competent, proceeded hastily to the disputed rock and negotiations were opened. A three-party talk went ahead, while on shore the Baroness of Aarnimetsä joined the throngs. Soon after Queen Aryanhwy and then also King Paul came down to shore to try to get some answers to the rumours that were spreading on the site.

From the beach we could clearly see angry gesticulations from the invaders on the rocky isle, and previous entries in the debate clearly shows what Cernac and Duarted think of the actions of the loyal Nordmark navy and the peaceable Aarnimetsä crew. After some lengthy talks, the invaders were finally persuaded to sign a no-claims document stating that neither they nor Insulae Draconis held any claim to the rock in Lake Marsjö known as Monkey Island, at which point Countess Siobhan felt comfortable, as representing Nordmark, to return the canoe via the hands of Aarnimetsä to Cernac and Duarte. From the shore we could clearly observe this exchange of signed document, done very carefully with the attack-dog held back, Lady Yolanda handing over the documents for signature at the point of a knife and the return of said documents to the safekeeping of His Excellency Vilhelm.

The immediate situation was resolved! The Nordmark canoe headed straight for shore, the Insulae Draconis marauders were allowed to re-enter their vessel, and Aarnimetsä’s proud flagship towed the boat of shame ashore. Nowhere in negotiations were paddles mentioned, so Countess Siobhan saw no reason to return them and proudly displayed them as they neared shore. The safe return of all vessels and personell and the legal claim of Monkey Island in Aarnimetsäs own Lake back in Baronial hands being their only goal.

Upon return to the beach, His Majesty King Paul was given all information from each vessel, although Masters Cernac and Duarte tried to claim that the only thing they signed away on the isle was a pebble, secreted in Cernac’s hand. His Majesty closely examined all parties and his vexation with the two invaders from Insulae Draconis, as well as their blatantly sea-unworthy Admiral was great. In the opinion of this reporter, this is not the last we have heard of this matter.